What if we asked “What if…?” (in bed)

I have memories of eating Chinese food with friends in college and in my early twenties and having everyone read their fortunes afterwards. We would then add the phrase “in bed” at the end of the fortune for laughs.  Yes, it was the pinnacle of maturity!  I couldn’t remember any exact fortunes so I looked some up on this fortune cookie website:

You are very talented in many ways…in bed

The greatest risk is not taking one…in bed

Today it’s up to you to create the peacefulness you long for…in bed

A new voyage will fill your life with untold memories…in bed

…in bed

Let’s bring the question of What if? into the bedroom.  To be clear, I’m not proposing suggestions or hinting at anything about the answers to “What if?”  I’m merely offering up the question and seeing what opens up in the space.  I see the question as a way of opening a door to a new room where you can walk in, check it out, and stay as little or as long as you like.  Maybe there is even another door in that room to someplace else.

If we zoom out to, I’ve been asking “What if” questions recently about other areas of life. I believe it’s in service of us as human beings to point the question to areas of our lives that we don’t typically talk about very much.  Like aiming a flashlight at a shadowy corner!

Hellooooooooo?

All parts of our lives deserve examination or re-examination to evaluate whether we are running on default settings or making conscious choices that serve us.  What have we accepted as “reality?”  I’m not making assumptions about change always being necessary. Change might feel right for some people and for others it’s an opportunity to re-choose the choices we’ve made.

So, back to “What if…(in bed)?” Who is uncomfortable already?

I usually only talk about these kinds of things with close trusted friends for fear of:

• Seeming inappropriate
• Making others uncomfortable
• Embarrassing myself
• Making myself look bad/weird/etc.

Also, my mom reads my blog!  Hi Mom!

Remember my life purpose I shared in my first blog post a few weeks ago?  Well, today I am the Wild Card who is kind of afraid my Mom will read this.  My inner critic or Gremlin if you will, is in my head like this:

Shhh! I’m trying to save you from embarrassment!

I’m joking and possibly creating some awkwardness here.  Why?  Because I’m already anticipating reactions, thinking of censoring myself, and so on.  I’m also joking because it is a way I avoid conveying in a more serious way, something I care about, and think is an important question to ask.

Here are some fortunes I made up:

What if things changed…in bed?

What if you changed who you thought you were…in bed?

What if you asked for what you wanted…in bed?

What if you allowed your most authentic self to emerge…in bed?

If you do turn away from some of these questions out of discomfort my only request is to ask yourself what’s underneath that reaction.  Of course, you have every right to refuse that request.  I will not take it personally if you stop reading my blog or have a less-than-stellar opinion of me.

This space is about reclaiming the power of “What if” questions and pointing them towards possibility, exploration, re-examination of beliefs, and so on.  It’s not a place to fan the flames of catastrophic thinking or fear.  That said, I do acknowledge that fear often stands in the way of exploring possibilities.

We live life once.  I believe we should enjoy it as the fullest expression of our authentic selves.  I myself am still working on it and this blog is part of that exploration. How does holding back and censoring ourselves get in the way?

There is power in asking What If questions. This is not a blog with “10 Magical Steps To Bliss” or advice to give.  I ask a lot of questions and trust you readers to come up with your own answers because you are creative, capable and fully in charge of yourselves! Everyone’s life and journey are unique.

I strongly believe there is an empowering space of possibility that lies beyond any What If question and that includes questions that end with “in bed.”